My First Post

First I'll say my wife likes to talk more than I do so you'll probably hear from her more than you will fromme :)  Anyhow, I'm very appreciative of all the kind words and prayers that have been shared with me and my family over the last week.  I guess I'll start off with some thoughts from the past week.  I'm high in spirit but unfortunately low in energy more often than I'd like to.  However, the last 2 days have allowed me to really enjoy some quality time with the family.  Unfortunately cancer is a disease that goes around too often these days.  The craziest thing to me is how rare it is for me to end up having a problem with the pancreas.  My family has lots of history of heart problems so I knew a life to 80 was improbable.  In a lot ways I'm just shell shocked.  I made the mistake of jumping on google the very first hours I was in the emergency room and they were running tests on a mass on my pancreas.  I remember the stats weren't flattering to say the least but I also don't remember anything saying 100%.  I'm taking solace right now in the fact that the avg patient with stage 4 pancreatic cancer is in the 60's to 80 and by golly I've got a lot more energy than that average patient.  I have so much to live for with my wife and 3 little girls so I'm 100% dedicated to keep fighting this as long as I can.  I've been warned that this a type of cancer that will never really fully go away but I can also hope for future advances in medicine.  I've got my family, friends and tons of prayer support but if you ask me, I've got all my chips cashed in and I've handed this over to God.  I think a lot of people would be mad at Him if they were given this news but if anything, I'm kind of mad at myself because he probably knew I could handle this.  I'm not pissed at anyone, only thing that upsets me that if my day should come, I leave behind my wife with 3 of the most adorable little girls in the world and me not there to love and help raise.  This week we'll have some appointments with cancer doctors from Norton and we may possibly be sliding down to Houston to learn more what "the best" have to say.  We'll see how monumental this week will be and just help us pray that we make some right decisions if they are to be made this week.
Craig