Things are tough right now. Craig continues to decline but still has moments where he seems "fine". It is increasingly difficult to figure out how to navagate the day. Do I get full coverage of help where someone is here with him when I need to run out or is he going to be okay for an hour? This is a struggle. One would think, get help just to be on the safe side but then he will rally and be able be by himself and even be productive around the house... the inconsistence makes me a crazy woman.
This morning I was pulling out of the driveway and Morgan wouldn't buckle in her carseat and I wanted to lose it. I buckled her in and then cranked up christain radio station and thought I need a HUGE dose of Jesus right now or this ship is going to sink. I began to think we have come to a point in this journey that it is just time to plow through. Just GET THROUGH this. There is not a lesson to learn here, just dig your heels in and survive through it. We have taken each struggle as a learning experience and clung to Jesus for guidance but I figured this was just the fork in the road where we are just going to survive it and learn a new path when Craig "moves" out. God stopped me right in my tracks. The lesson here is to continue to cling to Him in this stage of the game as well as the future. Thank you God for the awesome sound system in my car so when it comes to worship, I can do it loudly. (Yes, I was that crazy woman who sings in the car next to you at the stop light.)
Morgan's Birthday pictures to come...
3 comments:
Clinging to Jesus is the best place to be... Praying continuously for your peace as the journey changes once again. Always know that God sees the final, glorious destination even when we can't see to navigate the way. Loving you in Grace, Jane
This is where the two sets of footprints becomes one, as Jesus carries you when the "plowing through" becomes too muck. God love you and keep you close to His heart, as you know He will. I know that Craig will do everything he can, when he can, as long as he can. I am so very proud of Craig. I am proud of all of you. Please know that you are in our daily prayers.
God love and keep each of you.
Praying for you and your family each and every day...
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